@jgmac1106 A few short thoughts:
1. The explanatory text is nice, but runs a bit long for the uninitiated. I'm always worried that the length turns folks off? Perhaps something shorter for the gist of the idea with a link instead to a particular page that lays it out in more detail? I've also considered hiding some of the extra explanation behind a pop up or by using an abbr (or other appropriate html) tag with appropriate CSS hover markup so that when one hovers over a portion, they get a title-like window with all the gory details. Ideally, over time, with the spread of the concept the explanation won't be necessary at all.
2. One potentially crucial piece you're missing is that the post on their webpage HAS to have the permalink URL for your post on the page, otherwise the webmention will fail. Worse, without this bit of knowledge they won't know why it failed.